Big L's Twelve Days of Christmas

by Stephen Chesney (with minor additions by Mary Payne)

Twelve Drummonds drumming
Eleven Peelies piping
Ten Lennox leaping
Nine Bradys dancing
Eight Marks a-miking
Seven Swainstons swimming
Six Gills a-laying
Five Lorne Kings.
Four calling Blairs
Three Bill Hearnes
Two Myrtle doves
And a partridge in a bare knee.

Caption Competition #1

Radio London suggestion:

"No, no! I'm not taking the Michael, I suddenly had this strange sense of deja vu about running a radio station from a ship. "

Caption Competition #2

Radio London suggestion:

Alas, Mike spotted the alien invasion too late and before he could give warning, the flying saucer had beamed Greg up.

Caption Competition #3

Radio London suggestion:

Even after 35 years, the guys from Caroline North had never forgotten that Dave was a sucker for the old "boot polish on the eyepiece" gag.

Any suggestions for additions to the Geriatric Christmas Top Twenty?

Excerpt from a Geriatric Operation Keith West
These Boots Give Me Arthritis Nancy Sinatra
A Whiter Shade of Hair Procol Hairem
Mrs. Brown You've Got a Lovely Walker Herman's Hormones
Talkin' 'Bout My Medication The Who
Bald Thing The Troggs
Born to Be Mild Steppenwolf
Remember Bonking With the Band? The Shangri-Las
Botox Around the Clock Bill Haley
Let the Heartburn Begin Long John Baldy
Hippy Hip Replace Swingin' Blue Jeans
The Napping Song Shirley Ellis
Matthew and Grandson Cat Stevens
Woolly Pully Sam the Sham
Reach Out I'll Be Under the Chair The Thin on Tops
Papa Got a Kidney Stone The Temptations
Leopard-Skin Pill-Box Bob Dylan
Sticks And Stannahs Warm Sounds
Got to get you onto my Lift Cliff Bennett
Creak Alley Grandmamas & Grandpapas

From Laurence Findlay: Now I'm Sixty Four The Beatles

Click the snowman to email your suggestions!